The Boy Who Isn't There
by the.nerd.voice
Summary: Diana is left completely alone with her infant daughter for the first time. Or is she? Formerly "Him"
1. Him

It had taken Dan a lot to leave the girl with her mother, but he had to return to work. He knew that maybe if they were just alone together for a while, maybe Diana would warm up to Natalie. Just maybe.

Diana stood in front of the bassinette, biting her thumbnail absently. She knew how to tend to a child, lord knows all those hours and days and months she dedicated to her son. Her son. She didn't know if she could do the same for her daughter. If she wanted to do the same.

The week old infant opens her big brown eyes, not crying, but almost like she could feel her mother watching her. Her small body begins to squirm, needing some sort of nourishment. Diana continues to watch her, reaching her hand down and touching the baby's belly. It's what happened in Gabe, what if it was happening again. What if it was and she never even held her properly? Losing another child, she couldn't do it.

She moves her hand up as the girl roots to her knuckle and lets out a cry when she receives no milk from it, "You're hungry." Diana replies softly, biting the corner of her mouth as she reaches down and lifts her out of the bassinette. "I think Dan was giving you bottles." She says softly.

It was like she was learning it all over again. Coming to terms with it all over again. Her head filed it away to keep her from yearning for it. She unbuttons her shirt and brassiere, helping the girl find her best position like she did for Gabe. Natalie was different though. Not like her son. Gabriel always made a pig of himself, usually rendering her dry soon after she started . It causes her to chuckle to herself softly. Natalie was a slow eater.

Maybe it was her. Maybe it was her and not the baby. Maybe she did something wrong. Diana closes her eyes, attempting to stop the thoughts from racing through it.

"She looks like Daddy." She hears a soft child's voice say. It was close to her, she could feel it. Diana opens her eyes, seeing a toddler sit in front of her, playing with blocks, but also watching. She'd know him from anywhere, "Gabe?" She says just as softly, causing tears to spring to her eyes, "They were wrong. You're right here." Her mind completely off her daughter, who begins to scream. Diana glances down at the infant, picking her up before glancing back to where the boy was. Except, he wasn't there anymore.

She stands, swallowing as she fastens her shirt and returns the girl to her small, wooden and laced bassinette. Diana feels her lip begin to tremble as she glances around the room, a sense of dread starting to rise in her for a child she was told was dead. She dashes to the hallway, "Gabe?" She calls.

"She's crying." The boy lets the baby hold his finger.

"Don't do that to Mommy again. Understand?" She is to him in a flash, holding him close. She didn't want to let him go. She didn't know if this was real, she didn't care if it was. He was there, "Don't run off again." She kisses his blond hair.

"She's crying." He repeats, holding onto his mother just as much.

Diana glances to her daughter, not wanting to let her son go, "She's…she's okay."

"Don't think she was finished." Gabe smiles, "She can be big like me."

She sets him down, and nods when he continues to hold her dress, "Don't let go. Got it?" She waits for the toddler to nod before she picks the baby up, "Your brother scared me, but everything is okay now." Diana walks back to the rocker, reaching down and pulling Gabriel with her, "He isn't moving. Not even when I feed you." She watches her son as she positions her daughter again.

"That's gross." Gabe shakes his head, glancing to his blocks, "Can I play?"

She bites her lip, "You can't run off again. Promise me."

"Won't run off again." He shakes his head, being serious.

Diana grins slowly, "Go ahead. Your father will be so happy to see that you've come home."

"He doesn't like me."

"That isn't true."

He nods, "He'll yell. He doesn't like me." The boy glances at her with his piercing blue eyes, which were obviously a genetic trait from her.

"I'll take care of it." She smiles to him, happy to have her family complete again.


	2. The Boy Who Isn't There

Dan returns home from a long day of work, smiling when he sees Natalie snuggled in her mother's arm as she makes dinner. He could tell that it was hot dogs and macaroni and cheese. She hadn't made that since before their son had passed away. He nods, glad that she was starting to get over it. He looks at the set table, "Are we having a guest?"

"No why?" Diana smiles, glancing through the other doorway to her son playing with his usual blocks.

"Three placements. Natalie isn't eating what we are so-" He shrugs, smiling a little.

She glances to him, making a face, "I know that. I'm not crazy."

"Then who is it for?" He looks over, trying to see what she kept looking to in the other room. Dan notices the blocks spread around the floor, yet most in a pile.

"It's Gabriel's silly." She pats his chest as she walks by him, putting the bowl of macaroni and cheese on the table, "You know this is his favorite." She ruffles the hair of the boy who isn't there as he runs to his seat.

He shakes his head a little, "Diana." He says softly, "Are you feeling okay?"

She nods, "Of course. I feel amazing actually. Haven't felt so good in a while." Diana puts her daughter in her seat before putting a small amount on the boy's plate, "Make sure you eat that all now." She smiles to him, "My big boy."

Dan shakes his head, "Love, there's no one there."

"What?" She shakes her head, still smiling, "He promised that he's going to eat all of his supper. Aren't you glad he came back home?"

"No, Di, there's no one there. Gabriel is gone. He's dead."

Diana shakes her head again, looking at her baby boy, "I'm telling you that he isn't. I'm looking right at him and he's eating noodles." She looks back at her husband, "Dan, they were wrong. They were wrong and he's here and healthy and safe." She rambles a little, "Aren't you happy?"

He watches her a moment, shaking his head, "I'm going to call the doctor and we're going to get this fixed."

"But I don't need anything fixed. Our family is whole again and I am so happy." She shakes her head, "Just sit down and eat. Be happy for once."

"I am happy, with you and our daughter. Our daughter, Diana. We don't have a son."

"I told you he wouldn't like me." Gabe shakes his head, eating his cut hot dog.

"Don't say that." She shakes her head, "He loves you hon." Diana glances back toward her husband, "He thinks you hate him."

"How can I hate something that isn't even real?" He nods, moving to the seat where the setting was and waving his hand in the seat .

Diana snaps to almost when his hand slaps the cushion., "He…Where is he?"

"He's not here. Love, everything will be okay. Let me call the doctor." He moves back to his wife, wrapping his arms around her and holding her close a moment before moving from the room.

She stands there, just staring at the seat as her infant daughter begins to cry. She can't hear it though. Almost in a daze. She couldn't understand how he was so real to her and not to her husband. "Gabriel?" She whispers to no one in particular, not even the son who wasn't there.


End file.
